Abbey of Gethsemani – 3

This abbey environment is perfect to confront myself without the trappings of the day-to-day, which I have grown so addicted to. As I write out my ‘Retreat Offering’ check and look around me at my sparse yet beautiful room, I am ashamed that I have so much beyond what I need. In future I will try to de-junk my life, both in terms of not acquiring new things and also by giving away things that someone else will value more than I do.

Before thinking about what I want to achieve in the new year, it might be good to think about who I want to be. Perhaps now is a good time to revisit who I am, what I want to change about me and where I can begin. I start with the positives and am pleased to list the many thing I like about myself. Then I begin to think about the not-so-nice and find there are several things I’d like to change. To start with, I’d like to be less self-absorbed. America is so much about oneself. Each person is expected to be self-contained and self-sufficient and, yes, self-absorbed. So let that be my challenge. Let me consciously try to turn outward, be more curious about the world, more attuned to my surroundings, more sensitive to those around me. Let me be less guarded about my emotional self. We are all shaped by our experience and mine has taught me to be wary and careful. This attitude sometimes makes me closed and over-cautious, even though my nature is to be open and adventurous. I will try not to be inhibited by my baggage, as I live my life.