Visit to India - Mumbai

My visit to India, a year after moving to St. Louis halfway around the world, opens my eyes to some rich and unexpected rewards I never knew were mine. In a breathless moment of insight I see that I can have the best of both worlds. I can have the rare luxury of a constant newness.

We land in Mumbai soon after dawn, in 90 degrees Fahrenheit. As we drive towards Colaba, the open windows let in a balmy sea breeze. Soon my senses are overwhelmed by this city's sights and sounds and smells and colors. There is no gradual transition, rather an instant shift. Traveling along a once familiar route, I see the buses, the cyclists, the vendors and the street urchins with fresh eyes. Greedy to embrace this gift - this feeling of newness emanating from the familiar - I throw myself into my old/new lifestyle: walking under the coconut palms, dashing across the road dodging honking cabdrivers, drinking coconut water from the vendor at the street corner and browsing the old curio shops. 

Quickly, I slip from the busy, organized and independent lifestyle of previous months to complete decadence. Each room in Jyoti’s flat has one wall composed of sea - a breathtaking view that erases uncertainty and enables serenity. The days are full of reunions. My friends are unchanged and hungry for every detail – admiring of my ‘independence’, incredulous that I drive and shop and cook for myself, impatient to hear about the people I’ve met…

 

And then there is Kartik, unchanged and yet completely changed: confident, grown-up and self assured. He amuses us with his anecdotes and I marvel that this witty attractive young man was ever the baby who came to me in tears over a bruised knee or clung to my skirt shyly before strangers or threw a tantrum over something in the toy store… With mixed feelings I miss the little boy whose life centered around me, but am filled with pride that he has grown into this wonderful man. I know he will be different each time I see him and pray for him to remain as secure, happy and enthusiastic as he is today. I visit his apartment in Bandra, it is small and simple. Now he insists on paying for dinner and I smile to think of how independent he has become.